after watching the sixth harry potter movie, which, surprisingly, wasn't really that boring, i launched into the Order of Pheonix, Half-blood Prince and Deathly Hallows. actually, i'd only started to read Deathly Hallows last night, at approximately 12a.m. It was ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC. Sheer pleasure.
well, i dunno, but rereading the Deathly Hallows with the ending and explanations already implanted in my head really throw things into proportions. The first time i read the book, it was during the hols and i had a sleepless night, all night up reading the book like i did breaking dawn. the first time,it was really cool, awesome and really adventurous. as for some of the parts, i din't cry much--practically didn't--but it wasn't that sad at the time. i mean, there was really too much adventure and expalnations waiting, and curiousity got the best of me--like it always have-- and i just sort of flipped through them without much thought of what happened.
but Reading it again?
it threw much more back into proportion. i cried through so many places, i didn't think possible. i cried when hedwig died, cursing Rowling for making her die. Rowling claimed that it was necessary to signify the loss of dependance on some old part of Harry, to signify the growth of harry. And that idiot Rufus scrimgeour dying to save Harry? Dobby and allthe others, Fred, Tonks, Lupin. I don't understand why Tonks, Lupin, Fred, or even Colin creevey had to die? I mean, Fred and George were practically sharing one soul... and tonks and lupin? they just had a child! and now that child was gonna go through almost everything Harry had to. WHY?
but the most touching story of all--SEVERUS SNAPE. after all those years, after all OUR doubts, he turned out to be good. all those things he went through. he was the most tragic person in the whole story. It wasn't his fault that he was brought up to think of Muggles as Mudbloods. he even surprised himself by falling in love with one--Lily. and oh, at so young an age. it wasn't HIS fault that he was sorted into slytherin, wasn't his fault that he hanged out with those bad influences.i mean, they ARE slytherins, after all. who else was he supposed to hang out with? BUt the only thing he did wrong was passing the info to Voldemort, who then proceeded to kill the potters. i can imagine how heartbroken Snape is, so Heartbroken that he tok up the most dangerous job--A spy for Dumbledore. His love was so powerful that he risk everything to protect the son of his lover, even tho harry was a spitting image of James. So powerful that he created the impression of an evil person in other people's minds, never bothering to reveal what he had done for them, for the whole of hogwarts and the magical world. He was such a kind-hearted person, and to quote Dumbledore--"I think we sorted too soon." Snape wasn't MEANT to be in Slytherin; he deserved better. but it's a relief he died, even tho he shudn't, but what's the point of living, when both his purposes to live are achieved? he died loved, looking into the eyes of the one he loved most--Lily potter. it is the love story of the century.
and to quote Harry, "Does it hurt?" yes, the questions that lurk in all of our minds, Death and its mysteries. when Dumbledore said Harry had nothing to fear than Voldemort, i didn't get it the first time. now, reading it for the umpteenth time, it dawned on me. Dumbledore was talking about the mysteries of death, the mysteries that Harry had uncovered. i think the nicest thing in the seventh book was how Harry got to see his parents and Sirius and Lupin again. Padfoot, Prongs and Moony, reuninted. i think it meant a lot to Harry; it sure meant a lot to me. Imagine, a seventeen embracing death, something even Dumbledore couldn't until his last few months, Harry did it within mere minutes, just becoz it was the right thing to do. And when Harry asked the question, whether it'd hurt, i broke into sobs. i dunno why, it just seems appropriate. He apologized to Lupin for takin his son away, becoz of him, and when Rowling described Sirius as tall and handsome, Lupin and james and Lily, i dunno, i sorta broke down. it wasn't appropriate for so many to die for him, no matter how necessary. i feel sorry for Harry, for Lupin, for Snape, even, for all the things they'd missed out, and for all the things they would never have. it wasn't exactly a good thing Harry chose to come back. i mean, all the things he ever wanted was right there, on the end of a station. it was a very difficult decision, leaving all those he deemed precious--Dumbledore, Sirius, Lupin, his parents--behind and going back. but of course, being Dumbledore's man through and through, he was known to do the right thing always, no matter how hard. that's a lesson Rowling hammered in pretty hard.
rereading Harry Potter had made me think from a point i'd never had. We have a perfect family, if compared to Harry, and yet, as Harry struggles with him missing his parents and wanting to meet them, we are complaining how we'd like our parents to leave us alone. while Harry loses almost all that he is dear of--sirius, Lupin, dobby, even-- and he copes with it, we are here grumbling about too many troublesome realatives to look after. While Harry, Ron and Hermione fight desperately for not only thmselves, but also for the whole world,we are here, thinking that someone will improve the world for us, not wanting to make a move becoz life for US are too hectic and stuff. and while seventeen year ole Harry accepts Death as a part of his life, and embraces it, we are here, complaining, grumbling about how life is too short, afraid of what Death has to offer. you see, humans are afraid of forever, no matter what they claim, and the only thing that's forever in this world is the forever parting that comes with the Death package.
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